Book Review #2: More on Introverts

I originally wrote this for my Corps Newsletter, and waned to share it. Unfortunately, I did not receive a free copy of the book, so no bribery is involved (although that would be cool - how can I become one of those reviewers?!).

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“Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking” by Susan Cain

I give this book a 5-star rating! Would you describe yourself as a listener and a thinker? Then this book is for you! As an introvert, this book is revolutionary in our very extroverted society.

Cain digs into the latest research in psychology, sociology, and neuroscience to answer questions about being an introvert – is nature or nurture?  Can people change?  Is it caused by fear? How does one achieve balance?  She explores the challenges for and encourages the benefits of being an introvert across all ways of life: at school, work, and church; and in relationships with a partner, boss, child, and most importantly, with yourself.  Her book is filled with clear non-technical language and intriguing stories throughout the book, making it very accessible to everyone and both easy and enjoyable to read.  Sprinkled in are tidbits of hints and tips for introverts and those who know and love one.

Cain’s debut text provides a welcome voice that whispers softly to an introvert’s soul – “There is nothing wrong with you, and there are others out there like you. Look at these successful people who have gone before you. It is more than ok to be an introvert – it’s great!”

For more information, check out the Introverts’ Manifesto and the other articles on her website:  http://www.thepowerofintroverts.com/sixteen-things-i-believe/

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Also, since I initially wrote this post I have discovered more interesting links: 

1. A long (read: 4 pages) Psychology Today article - basics of an introvert

2. Lifehacker tips on how to avoid becoming an introverted weirdo - especially key if you live and/or work alone. 


3. Another article on introverts in church

4. An advice column's look at 'faking it' versus 'being yourself'

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PS: writing for the newsletter has really made me sit down and write more, and I really want to be more disciplined because I love reading and words and blogs etc. Any tips for writing regularly when you don't (necessarily) feel like writing? Topics aren't the problem, I've created a ton of new posts but never really finished them (ok, or even really started some of them other than the title). I've set up a few posts to go up automatically over this week while I try to write some more. Yay, blogging! 

Lies

I don't know about you, but sometimes it is a daily, even momentary fight for truth in my mind. There are lies that silently whisper into my ear, sneak in through my peripheral vision, and easily roll off the tongue of my inner voice. There are thoughts that are my default in certain situations, but are nonetheless simply false. Do you know what I mean? And we must fight for truth from the inside. Or like Ben Stuart of Breakaway ministries has said, "What you think about is what you care about, and what you care about, you will chase." (subscribe to their audio podcast here - do it!!)

How often do I allow myself to be caught up in those untrue thoughts? I criticize myself, over-think things, dwell on mistakes, and compare myself to others.  I doubt God and his love and goodness. I don't stop to give thanks. Far too often.  And how often am I thinking about "what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable... things that are excellent and worthy of praise"? (Phillipians 4:8 NLT) Not enough. But I'm praying that God will continue to teach me how to hide his word in my heart and mind. I beg that he will show me ways I am being deceived by these lies, and that he will speak his truth and love into my life. I pray these things for you as well. 

For it is written: "We are not fighting against humans. We are fighting against forces and authorities and against rulers of darkness and powers in the spiritual world." Ephesians 6:12. And I especially like verse 10: "Let the mighty strength of the Lord make you strong." I don't have to do this myself. I know I don't have the strength, and I keep trying to make myself strong and failing because I am not drawing from His strength. I am truly in awe of how he helps us:

  "So put on all the armor that God gives. Then when that evil day comes, you will be able to defend yourself. And when the battle is over, you WILL be standing firm. Be ready! Let the truth be like a belt around your waist, and let God's justice protect you like armor. Your desire to tell the good news about peace should be like shoes on your feet. Let your faith be like a shield, and you will be able to stop ALL the flaming arrows of the evil one. Let God's saving power be like a helmet, and for a sword use God's message that comes from the Spirit." Ephesians 6:13-17 CEV. And according to John 10:10, "A thief comes only to rob, kill, and destroy. I [Christ] came so that everyone would have life, and have it in its fullest." 

What are the flaming arrows in your life? How have your shield of faith and your sword of the Word extinguished them?  How is Christ giving you life to the fullest, despite the enemy's attempts to steal and destroy? What do you do to focus your thoughts on Christ throughout the day, particularly when you have a tendency to hear and believe a lie? 

May you be protected with God's armor and made strong by HIS mighty strength. 

265 too many

What would you do if you had huge (and by huge I mean massively ginormous) amounts of money laying around? My alma matter just got a ridiculously huge donation, and while I think it is great that people are willing and able to donate to the school they went to, it also seems like an enormous waste. I mean, what is that money actually going towards?  How is the research conducted going to improve the world? I was privileged to hear a speech today about the Healthy Start initiative, which implements programs in high-need areas to reduce infant mortality, so that babies can live longer, healthier lives. There are 104 sites across the nation, with over 300 cities qualifying for a site (so the demand is 3x more than the resources allow for), and for these sites there is a total federal budget of $100 million dollars -> ~1 million dollars per site. A lot, I know. But the donation that some rich dude just gave to CMU could spread the program to 265 more sites (admittedly for just 1 year, or many more years for less sites) and slash infant mortality, making a real impact on the next generation. Instead of donating to a privileged, wealthy university to do more research (I think?), one could have sustained whole programs, saved thousands, if not millions of lives, or, like fixed poverty or something. I'm just saying. 

What exactly are we treating and/or trying to prevent?

I'm not sure the correct way to say this exactly, but I'm going to do my best. It may seem a little radical, or crazy, to people in the medical professions, but this is what I'm thinking about. 


There are so many articles and studies and statistics that point to childhood trauma, addictions, sexual promiscuity, and many other problems of our time which have a huge impact on the prevalence, spread, and/or treatment of many diseases. For example:


Sexual promiscuity -> STDs, AIDS, Teen pregnancy, single mothers
Divorce, childhood trauma, addictions; & Abuse - Verbal, physical, sexual
-> chronic illness, many stress-related or stress-provoked diseases, mental illness, depression, earlier death


I could go on and on. But so many of our nation's (and the world's) health and psychological problems, and the problems that those problems lead to, can be attributed to unbiblical ways of living and ideals that go against God's design. 


What if, instead of teaching safe sex, 'equitable' divorce, and violence, we taught about Christ and his saving and redeeming power, the biblical model for marriage (sex) and parenting, how to love one another with gentleness and yet with strength, how to stand up for one another instead of put each other down, and ways to cope with stressful situations, anxieties, and fears from a biblical perspective? What if by promoting healthy families, biblical men and women loving and committed to each other and working together to raise children, we were able to prevent so many of these problems today? How about championing Christ's power over any addiction or disease? What if the problems of our society do not just lie in systems and poverty and disease, but in the fact that we are not in a right relationship with God and living according to his principles? What if these things could eliminate divorce, sexual promiscuity, STDs, teen pregnancy and single parents, addictions, and abuse somewhat eliminating poverty, chronic disease, and depression? How much pain and suffering would we preventing? How many programs and projects would we be able to eliminate, thereby saving resources and time to devote to other aspects and others who are more in need?  What if God's way is better, because that is the way it was supposed to be, and actually has a meaningful impact on how much disease and suffering there is in the world? What would happen if we focused on God's ways instead of the world's ways? 


I hope this made some sense - I'm sure I'll post more about it in the future to clarify things. It's basically just a bunch of questions I have about the way medicine, specifically preventative and reactive medicine is performed.  

Thoughts about this generation and our culture

So, my not so little brother is off to college for his freshman year at OU today - wow! Time flies. I'm excited for him, and proud of him, and nervous for him all at the same time. I know how much I learned and changed throughout college, and I hope he has just as great of an experience. I am also praying that he meets some great new friends in his dorm and classes.  

I've been thinking a lot lately about this next stage of life - not a student anymore, but hoping to be again; and an adult but not completely independent. In addition, I have read many books and articles lately about femininity and masculinity, singleness and marriage, and my generation and the one to follow. It's hard because I'm going forward to pursue a demanding career that I believe God is calling me to, and yet at the same time eventually desiring to have a family and honor God in marriage and raising children. I was privileged in Philly to meet several Christian women who are mothers and doctors, which was very encouraging, but they all said it was challenging and takes sacrifices on all sides.  

Reading I recommend: 

• Revelations of a Single Woman: Loving the Life I Didn't Expect - (Book) A lot of her thoughts and concerns resonated with me. 
• The New Eve  - (Book) Interesting ideas of biblical femininity, but found it hard as a single woman to relate to a lot of these 'stages of life'. I also thought it was quite a bit focused on marriage and children, obviously a major part of most women's lives, but in some ways made me feel like I wasn't 'fulfilling my purpose as a woman' because I don't (yet) have a husband or family. 
• A Woman's Guide to Women: A Blog for Men - great blog, very funny, touches on many of these issues
• Thoughts from Fabs - another woman's perspective; some posts are very thought-provoking 
• Make it Mad - male perspective on a lot of these topics, covering such ideas as being a biblical gentleman or lady in our society, dating, singleness, etc. 
• Ally Spots - great young adult woman talking about these issues and many others 
• Relevant Magazine: Why So Many Can't Find the One and this month's article about Christian sexuality and scary statistics about within the young adult generation. 

Audio I recommend: 

• Brook Hills Audio  - Their series on the Next Generation: children, parents, biblical femininity and masculinity, marriage, singleness, and the home. I've really enjoyed their thoughts on how unbiblical masculinity and femininity has invaded our culture, and lies people believe about their gender, marital status, or role in the church. They emphasized that being biblical men and women (and husbands and wives and singles and parents) will teach the next generation about Christ. 
• Breakaway ministries - Can't recommend this one highly enough! Especially their series on the gift of singleness and dating. 

In conclusion, I've really been pondering these topics lately and it seems like a lot of others are too. How have your ideas about gender, sexuality, marriage, and/or singleness been twisted by our culture? How can they be redeemed for God's glory?

  

For me, growing up in a divorced family, I just always said I didn't want to get divorced. But that is a far cry from having a healthy, God-centered marriage, which is how God views marriage. And I've fallen prey to believing the Hollywood tale of romance is how it should be, which isn't true or biblical either. It's also so easy in our culture to not be content with whatever state we are in, and to want something more than we have right now. I have also seen that feminism and striving for women to be exactly the same as men has affected our ideals - not that they aren't equal, but they are different.

Thankfully, God's teaching me a lot about these things and what it means to be a biblical woman who is striving for His kingdom, apart from what the culture is whispering to us everywhere we look. And I mean everywhere.  God never said it would be easy.  Will you join me in praying for our generation in these issues that stand in such contrast to our culture's ideals, and in living with God's Word and plans in mind in these areas in your own lives?